May 15, 2011

Facing Fears

I made this little card for myself and printed it out, it's next to my computer as a good reminder of changes that are coming soon.

This summer will be filled with new directions and new adventures.  I will share more about that when I can.  But what I will share with you is my fear over change.  The things that are taking place, I want them, really really want them.  But I'm also afraid of what that change means.  I'm afraid my little adventure won't be successful or that it will cause undue stress on me and my family.  I'm afraid I won't be up to the task and challenges that will be demanded of me.  I'm afraid of falling back into old patterns that have long been resolved.  But then I think to myself, it will all work out, there is no challenge you can't face, you are a different and more mature person, you won't fall back into the old when you've learned so much from those times.  The rewards will be greater than the risks.  And I breathe and trust in things bigger than me and know that everything will be okay.

Speaking of old patterns, you will not believe what I did this weekend - cleaned off my bead tables!!!  I'm gearing up to turn this room into a serious bead factory for the next few weeks and needed a fresh start.  I can't believe it.  I should have taken a before picture - you wouldn't believe then either!  Sadly, it won't last as I go into a polymer clay frenzy and bead trays will be stacked all over this place.  (This is one of three tables that I work on.)

And I thought I'd share this very cool box that my daughter Evangeline made for me for Mother's Day.  You can see it on the shelf in my studio.  It's made from phone book pages.  That kid is brilliant I tell you!  I was talking to her the other day about what she wanted to do when she grew up, it went something like this:

Mom: "And so what do you want to do after high school."
Vangie: "Have fun and travel with Hannah."
Mom: "That's cool, but what about after the summer, you know like for college."
Vangie: "I don't want to go to college."
Mom: "Well tough, you have to go for at least two years.  You can take business classes and study some things that you like."
Vangie: "Why?  I'm going to open an Etsy shop.  How hard can it be?" (Last sentence dripping with sarcasm.)

End of conversation.  As I walk away shaking my head and trying not to laugh!

9 comments:

Jen V. said...

Cheers to new adventures and that easy little Etsy shop!! haaaaaaaaaaa

Heather Powers said...

Thanks Jen!

I guess that just means I'm such a pro that I make it look effortless.

Chris said...

Out of the mouth of babes. :o) That is a very beautiful photo of you and your girls!

quickcer said...

It is a little scary to start down a new path, but every time I did it during my working years, it was a great learning experience. Trust in yourself and only look back at the good lessons you have learned. Fear is not to be feared, but to be embraced. It will be the grease to your engine and will drive you forward. Enough of that---just love and enjoy every day.

Laura Twiford said...

AAAhhh, the innocence, gotta envy it sometimes! They all find their way eventually. It took me awhile to realize that as I stressed over every "bad" decision my kids made. They get there and so do we!

Off the Beadin' Path said...

Your post brought to mind a little phrase that pops up occasionally: "Change is inevitable, but not always welcome"! I hope your changes will be most welcome, but the transition period can be unknown territory. I think you have what it takes to survive it!

Pretty Things said...

You so sound like me -- I am scared every day I wake up lately!

mairedodd said...

i seem to be posting about fear lately too - i am glad that you are pushing forward - you know you can do it... we know you can do it... you are an incredible role model for your kids... and a beautiful woman!
never let the fear block your light -

Momma Bear said...

Ahh the innocence of youth!
too bad we all loose some of it in the end,
this is why we have kids so they can remind us we were once this brave and optimistic of the infallibility of the world at large!
I could use some of that bravado and optimism right about now....